Funny Wedding One Liners

My wife tends to leave well enough alone. Unfortunately, things are rarely well enough.

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What is most embarrasing thing that can happy to a man? Running into a wall with a hard-on and breaking his nose.

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Success is a relative term – It brings so many relatives!

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My Wife Says I Never Listen, Or Something Like That…

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Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

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We have a quiet home life. I don’t speak to her and she doesn’t speak to me.

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Did you hear about the wife who shot her husband with a bow and arrow because she didn’t want to wake the children?

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Before we got married I caught her in my arms. Now I catch her in my pockets.

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He met her in a revolving door and has been going around with her ever since.

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Behind every successful man, there is a woman – And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two!

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Every man/woman should marry – After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.

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The wise never marry – And when they marry they become otherwise.

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Our marriage was a love match. plain and simple, she was plain and I was simple!

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